Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Liar...Liar

I have had this chronic lying ability [or is that a disability] right from….hmmm..well my birth I suppose. Thought of writing a post to share it .

Let me take you back in time, to my primary schooling days…now now..no need to go as far as 1947. It was the mid 80s and I was in my 2nd grade. The talk of the town was a movie called “enter the dragon”, Bruce lee’s personality, stunts, fights were the things every kid in my class was talking about. Not to be left behind I bluffed to the kid sitting next to me that I had seen enter the dragon thrice. That was it…some five boys surrounded me and were begging to tell the story of the movie. So there I was narrating the story of a movie, which I had not even seen in posters.

The movie started off in a dark forest with streaks of light passing through the trees…on one side was the deadly, beastly, ugly looking dragon spitting fire and on the other side our cool and whacky Bruce lee ready to kick its ass … Until my 6th grade when I finally did see the actual movie I never knew enter the dragon did not feature a dragon at all. How misleading the titles of Hollywood movies are for young impressionable minds.

So my story, rather, my graphic story telling became quite famous and I had boys surrounding me during lunchtime, intervals, even games period and listening to it. Not just my class kids but kids from other sections and even from 3rd grade were in queue. Every time I tell the story there would be a new point added probably inspired by some latest tamil movie I saw..like murattukalai or a thambikku endha ooru.

Desi twists were added so that my listeners could relate more. So we had the dragon killing Bruce lee’s family ….his father who was a honest cop in forest department, mother, sister brother et al…and Bruce lee was taking revenge on it. Kills all the dragon’s henchmen…err… I mean henchdragons and then goes on to kill the main villain dragon in the grand climax.

Incidentally there was a guy from 3rd grade who had seen the actual movie and told to my listeners that there were no dragons in the movie…But…none…not even one of my listeners believed him…In fact I am sure even if Bruce lee had personally turned up and told them the real story they would not have believed it. Reminds me of a Winston Churchill quote ..“A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on”.

Another incident, which I remember, took place during my 4th grade. That was the first time we started using pens. From boring wooden pencils to pens of different colors, shapes and models, every kid was excited. Here started my new game. As per the rules of the game we should sprinkle ink on a small sheet of paper and then fold into eight. When we open it Lo! And behold the abstract sketch of what we were in our past life will be revealed. Only catch is the pattern can be deciphered by the one and the only – Yours truly the holy nautanki baba. All my classmates used to bring their piece of paper to me, I just connect those sprinkled ink dots to make a figure and conclude that the person was something. Since I was good in psychology I dealt it efficiently. All my girl followers were rabbits, peacocks, birds and other sweet n cute things,., and the boys used to be lions, tigers and dragons. Of course the class bullies were made pigs and dogs.

This game went on for almost a month. Until one fine day when the class teacher got hold of me. The rest as they say was history. I was made to stand on a bench and my teacher gave a lecture on superstitions. I tried to argue with her and even offered her my new ink pen and a piece of paper to prove I am right. She was a hard customer I say.

I better save my other exploits for more posts..probably can have sequels.. As a saying goes “He who cannot lie does not know what truth is”. In fact all my lies were a journey to find the truth. Do you believe me?

31 comments:

Meher :) said...

Ippo idhellam nejama illena poi ya?? :P

I was thinking maybe Nautanki saala was the best name for you - considering your 'fire-putting' tactics :D But Nautanki Baba sounds good

:D :D Hail Nautanki Baba :)))

Nautankey said...

Its true..I swear on..hmm..thinkin of some scape goat :P...

Arrey when was i fire putting..even yesterday was trying to douze the fire at curious's place...

Me n baba..sounds like a good profession :P

Unknown said...

Actually I used to one of ur kinds too.. Remember the vivekananda illam/Ice house in triplicane...

Sometime in 80's, it used to be an empty worn down building! And i cooked up this amazing ghost story that became a rage with my cousins...Which eventually gave me the patta per "Anathals!" :P

ooooooohhhh for the nautankey baba! :D U can actually market this idea and make it a rage... Like those stupid and weird tea cup josiyams...

So will we be seeing u anytime soon on Vijay TV everyday morning reading ink prints? :D :D Wear some pink on ya ok! :P

Prasad said...

ROFLLLLLLLllllllll!!!!!!! @ the dragon killin bruce lee's family!!! man!!!!

N'key baba sounds great! buhahahahahahahahahaha!

Nautankey said...

Curious,
Oh yeah ghost stories..kids love it anything spooky..have played many tricks on my poor sis.

Echoos me...nowhere do babas wear pink..its saffron..soon u will see me not just in vijay TV but also in foreign channels..and as an author of self help books which teach how to pick ur own nose :P

Nautankey said...

Pras,
Infact bruce lee-ku BGM wud be ooo oru thendral puyalagi varudhey :P

so its B to the A to the B to the A :))

Ruth said...

When did you stop lying, Nautankey?

:)

See, this story is a perfect analogy of how we Americans have come to believe in our government. We like the made-up story better than the truth! All that slaying of evil dragons - that may not exist or be as evil as we've been told!

It's so fun coming here and a) reading your stories - I love them, and b) reading the comments with all the Tamil (??).

Nautankey said...

Ruth,
I havent yet stopped lying..and dont think I am ever going to :)

Every government lies to its citizens and wants them to toe their line.It all boils down to media who will need to unmask the lies.

And thanks will keep reeling out more stories :) and yeah it is tamil.Sometimes it gives the native touch and since we are neo tamils we cant write comments in pure tamil without mixing english :)

Meher :) said...

Curious

I suggest a long flowing dress with saffron & pink stripes.

What do you think?

And preferably - Nautanki Baba's beard also dyed in shades of saffron & pink, to match his dress

:D:D :D :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Nautankey said...

Yucks...and all men will be surrounding me..puhleaasee..I am straight and only lady devotees followers allowed inside the ashram[specificaitions n preferences will be isused shortly :)]

pRADdy said...

haha dragon in that movie..lol..dude u have good imagination way back then itself..can imagine how it will be now :P:P

Tarun Goel said...

Jai ho Nautankey baba ki !!!

S.. Diva said...

he hehe... funny!
i lied recently, a good-lies-day :)

Nautankey said...

Praddy,
Well one particualr version of the story had a vamp dragon too :) didnt try to seduce bruce lee though :P. Now the imagination is toned down thanks to the mundane work..

Tarun,
You toooo

Nautankey said...

Sneha,
Recently...hmm shows you are an occasional offender :).I do that too regularly :)

swashbuckler said...

imagination man! lol... hope u didnt make bruce lee to dance to a love song!!
btb, the ink paper fold trick was one of my favourites too.. i was one of the judges for the best artist!! never gave it a psychological touch.. was in an all boys school! so no point! :D

A said...

poor classmates of yours! they must be cursin you now :p

Nautankey said...

Swashbuckler,
Well there were only inspiratuional songs no duets..acsun movie u see :). Oh boys school..that kills a little bit of ur imagination :P. I was in all boys school in 9-10th,was a total bore man.

Arpita,
They must be feeling abd that they missed out a long term association with a screenplay writer like me :))

Anonymous said...

:D
I loved the N'key baba stuff. Followers it seems. LOL. I'll courier my ink blot to you. Will you predict for me as well?

Nautankey said...

Swat,
Thanks :)..waiting for the courier.also e-transfer some dakshina to my bank account :)

Anonymous said...

That was one hilarious post that made my day!! ROFL!!
Bring the sequels please!

Nautankey said...

Verbi,
Thanks for dropping by.And up bringing the sequels soon. But thinking of merchandising them..well if gods can be merchandised why cant lies be :P

Kanupriya said...

Ha Ha Ha...Now I know the reason of the name "Nautankey"...Btw, this game of sprinkling ink and identifying a character used to be there in my class as well :-), and yeah my class also meant mid 80s for class 1 & 2 :D

Nautankey said...

Kanupriya,
Thanks for dropping by. Yeah I too learnt it from my sis or neighbour's kid..not too sure.But patented it under my name in my class :). There was another racket/scam which I did during the reliance cup of 1987..another post i guess :)

kaushik said...

that was really funny!

But, how do I know that you did not just make this up????? :p

Cheers!
Kaushik

vimmuuu said...

You have been tagged :
http://vimalsparadise.blogspot.com/2008/10/clicked.html

Nautankey said...

Kaushik,
LOL I dont bluff on tuesdays..the day when this post was put..oh yeah today too :))

Vimmu,
thanks.Will try it duded..

vimmuuu said...

Wow, that was one different post. But how do I believe you on this ? LOL.

There wouldnt be anyone in this world who didnt lie. We lie for different reasons. As long as the lie doesnt hurt another person, I think its ok!!!

But ur lie hurt the kid who actually knew the story !!! LOL.

A said...

hello vetti post somethin new

Nautankey said...

Vimmu,
i dont bluff on tuesdays :P..and that kid he shud have kept off seeign the zeal of my audience LOL

Apeeta,
done your honour.

Nautanki sssaala said...

nice :-) ... u write really well man. keep up the good work!