Wednesday, November 5, 2008

An unfair world.

With the arranged marriage drama going with full josh in mine as well as my other friends’ places ["You guys are in the wrong side of 20s and if it become 30 no one will give girl for you"-a pretty threatening warning from my friend's mom].One thing which stuck me was the matrimonial ads - Fair, slim, good looking girl. The four letter F word [don’t let skewed thoughts take over your mind I meant-FAIR] is like THE priority for the search.

I vividly remember the ad where the father of an ex-not-so-pretty girl exclaims 'Kundali mil gayee' after she turns pretty using the Fair n Sickly cream and bumps into handsome young man. Though I wish we had many more sportive fathers like that, my mind starts processing the question why Indians are obsessed with fairness. This obsession has no gender bias,while all the girls want the color of nicole kidman the guys too with the advent of specialized male fairness creams want a piece of the cake[SRK ad was seriously Ewww I could digest his bath tub adventure].

If I am gonna claim that I don’t get attracted to the lighter skinned ones that would be like Mullah omar taking white lilies to the American air bombers. But then more than the color its the complexion which plays an important role. Sadly the gullible consumers don’t know the difference between color and complexion and get fooled by the false claims of fairness cream ads.

The Indian fairness cream market is worth a whopping 800 crore so why would they think about ethics to put up racist ads. It’s an open secret that fairness creams don’t make us fair. Unless until they can go through the epidermis [the outer layer of skin] they can no way make us fair. But then they can whiten us temporarily like bleaching agents by reducing melanin.

So why all this gyaan about fairness now? Well last week this supposedly enlightened blog owner went to a beauty salon, fell for the sweet talk of lady receptionist and agreed to get a skin lightening treatment done, total cost only 2k!! The beautician was waxing eloquence of how I would look after two days with the effect of the treatment blooming on my face then. The net result-well it has been 4 days since and the cute delhiwali across my bay who used to give a coy smile has stopped that too. Thanks for all the blooming.

This is a nation where even the gods are obsessed with color, imagine Lord Krishna asking his mommy Yashoda - "Radha kyun gori, main kyun kaala?" meaning "Why is Radha so fair, while I am so dark?”. What am I a mere mortal when compared to that :-) . So next time I am gonna try that skin de-pigmentation treatment which costs twice the GDP of Rwanda, let me check the blooming effect then.

Who knows may be the girls are asking for fair, handsome guy with 6-packs in matrimonial ads. Let me have at least one of those. Or even better I may be noticed in any of the media parties which I get invites by mistake and bag a chance to act in movies. Then you guys would see me in Page 3 or in a stardust cover with my right hand around Katrina, left on Minisha Lamba, Genelia pleading to give her the half eaten apple in my hand and ......hmmmm life is a weird cauldron indeed :-)

56 comments:

Meher :) said...

Me first

\o/

Let me read & comment again :D

Nautankey said...

hee hee..sure Ms.'Boss'y meher :P

Ruth said...

I'm glad to see you address something that has dominated the history of beauty standards in many cultures.

Don't do it, don't do another de-pigmentation treatment!!

Prasad said...

ROFLLLLLLLLLLLlllllll u got a skin lightning done!!! ROFLllllllll!!!!

and btw if gals want 6 pack abs...sorry boss! i only got one BIG FAMILY PACK :DDDDDDDDD

Smita said...

lol :D

One of the so called myths of our society as if fairness of face affects the fairness of soul...

BTW u r seriously trying for a 6 pack abs??? Good luck ;-)

& Amen for your dreams :D

Meher :) said...

6 pack abs eh ;) Good good :D

Please put up photo - in a dress, make-up and pose a la SRK in OSO

:D :D :D

I used to feel bad as a kid - why was my elder sis fair & pretty and I was not.. now am like.. Light le! :))

Meher :) said...

Not meaning to say.. am not pretty now, though :))

Anonymous said...

LOL @ Prasad's family pack :D
I don't know what to say to this. Man wants a slim, fair skinned,good looking woman.
Woman wants a tall, dark and handsome man!
So cliched...
Now thanks to SRK, 6 packs and family packs are coming into the picture..

Nautankey said...

Sindhu,
Beauty lies in eyes of beholder ba..if someone has a pre-conceived notion that jolie or pitt is definition of beauty we can care a damn about them..and enzoi life :)

Nautankey said...

Ruth,
i would do that de-pigmentation only if i wish to go bankrupt. As of now no idea like that :)

Nautankey said...

Praad,
Yes machi did that..they made me a bakra ..there was a very pretty sikkimese lady in reception... saachuputta:).

I am sure u can do a six packs... hide them in ur pocket.. didn't mean the abs but cigarette packs :P

Nautankey said...

Smita,
Gosh!! When did i tell i am taking 6 packs.There were 3 choices fair,handsome,6 packs..my choice was fair and thats y de-pigmentaton :P...

I wud prefer a 6pocket cargos than working for a 6pack ab :)

Nautankey said...

Swat,
Its heights of sterotypes.. will someone mind a partner like nandita das *drool* or say no just bcoz she is not fair.Wish the matri ad guys get some sense instilled.

Anonymous said...

Mullah carrying white lillies to american air bombers LOL..i guess when u say "lies" we just buy them! Orange bermuda, green shirt, dark skinned but face having a new de-pigmentation done! guess I'll greet u the moment i see u!

Nautankey said...

Verby,
Ahemm Ur description did make me go to the mirror and check myself :) shud look pretty weird and hence easily recognizable..

I thought of MNS Raj doing the liy thing to laloo..but then since its US elections time scribbled some internationally viable simile :)

Prasad said...

yes swat i hate tht SRK *()&(*&*(
he has made my family packs jus occupyin shelf space!!!!

and yes N'key...nandhita das is :DDDDDDDDD and also not allskinny ppl are good!!! yuckkkkkkkkkkk!!!

in TN lotsaaaaa ppl find namitha to be :DDDDDDDD

Anonymous said...

Even I hate him Pras. But not for the reasons you do :D

Meher :) said...

Namitha is THE MOST yuckiest actress, seriously!!

Nautankey said...

Pras,
Skinny folks are a sad example :).. and welcome to the anti-SRK Club..

Sindhu,
Namitha does look like a whale..or a seal as she is doing a lot of beach dances :P but still i think she has a pretty face else she wud have gone the mumtaj way..just a 2 years stint kinds.

Tarun Goel said...

So you have become beauty conscious, Beautifool :P

Anonymous said...

I hereby publicly declare that if at all I suicide this guy who names himself "nautankey" will not be held responsible for my act! Now can i get a work of yours plss??

Nautankey said...

Tarun,
Well a beautiful fool is not bad I think :)

Nautankey said...

Verby,
Accepted u love adventure sports[meant reading my script].Sending you free tickets for the show :P

vimmuuu said...

I would be writing a post on matrimonial very soon; thought I would put it towards the end of this year. So cant comment much here, but I would like to make bold statement ---

" GIRLS ARE EXPECTING WAY TOO MUCH THESE DAYS " :D

All the best with your search, buddy!

Meher :) said...

she might look a little better if she dint try too much of her irritating false pout :-|

Bhargavi said...

"Who knows may be the girls are asking for fair, handsome and guy with 6-packs in matrimonial ads. Let me have at least one of them.".. one of what ? fair handsome guy with 6 packs ? omg...;-).. good luck with the "search"!!

Nautankey said...

Vimmuu,
Expectations are high on both sides just that these days girls also get lot of options :)..so better go to the beauty salon or gym :))

Nautankey said...

Sindhu,
Yeah she wud look lot netter without the pout but then thats the demand of crass commercial cinema :)..no one expects her to act or show any other expression :P

Nautankey said...

Parkavi,
to make it clear.There r 3 things A)fair B)handsome C)6packs.. B&C are out of bounds for me..while A probably try a MJ style plastic surgery :P...Danks for the wishes patti

Kanupriya said...

LOL...last sentence of your imagination was too good! I remeber an old aunt who was having this great rationale abt why a fair bride:
- if the groom is fair, then the bride HAS to be fair else the match will not look good
- if the groom is dark then too the bride has to be fair so that the next generation kids can be atleast fair in that family!!!
Ha Ha Ha...Oh that obsession for fairness!

Nautankey said...

Kanupriya,
That was the most logical explanation we coud get :P... What are they going to gain by having a fair generation..imagine if the guy is too fair they wont get a girl to match his fairness at all..at times its a handicap too :)

Anonymous said...

LOL ... i hope by now the blooming effect and that girl near ur place has started smiling again .. :P
I agree with vimmu girls ask too much these days when it comes to arranged marriages ...
this i have noted mainly among the brahmin families ..
they need a guy to earn huge amount of money or he should be in US ..he should have done MS and the list goes on ..
best option is love marriage these days :P

Unknown said...

really?

Didn't know fairness was one of the preferred thingy is man hunting! :O and you for skin lightening treatment.. :)) :)) Loosapa nee? :D :D

btw..no girly siblings around thr or what? Not even borrowed ones? Chaaa paavm nee... Andha 2000rs eh.. avangaalukku thandha...romba ccheap and naturalaaa kariyaam mudinjirukkum... :D :D all it would have taken is a few hours of icky patience... :D :D to have random goo on u face! :D

Gayathri said...

I was in the wrong continent. :P
It is great here - they love my tan, my complexion, blah blah blah. And they consider me 'beautiful'. Yay!
But, the skin-lightening treatment - I mean, seriously? I second Curious. Loosapa nee? :P

Nautankey said...

Arvind,
Havent doen the second de-pigmentation one..so blooming effect unable to be witnessed.

And maaan love mariage is still tougher.After accepting love they will put conditions to be fulfilled and then ur in a tangle :)

Nautankey said...

Curious and gayathri,
Well if the person who is canvassing for the skin ligtening treatment is a cute beautician closely resembling kangana ranaut.. Leave skin lightening I'd have jumped for skin removal treatment too :P

Curious,
Which age are you? The day arvindswamy hit silverscreen. Fair has become an important criteraia in man hunt.

Gayathri,
You better stay there :P.. and yeah its very paradoxial..while our women folk wanna get whiter..the caucassians try their best to get a tan :)

Unknown said...

Dude... after Dham dhoom...I think that beautician wouldn't want to be Kangana Raut! :O :O

And Aravind Swamy is long gone! :)) Temme this.. Do you also expect a gori mem in return?

Nautankey said...

Curious,
I havent seen dham dhoom :)..hopefully she too doesnt see it.. and you are seriously out of touch with TN matrimonial market girl :) ..many still have the roja hangover..and leave roja recently heard that a demand from someone was arvindswamy in Leo coffee Ad :O..imagine that..

Gori mem? I aint that crude. Probably seen too many dusky beauties :))

Gayathri said...

I remember my dad used to say that he was in trouble coz I was dark, supposedly he would have had to pay more dowry. I am like !!!!!!!!!!
I suppose it is the insecurity in the person. If you are comfortable with how you look, and confident, there is nothing to worry about, no?

Unknown said...

"many still have the roja hangover.."

God..Supreme court le cas epotu andha padathe TV inime poda ban pannanam! :P :P Dont these guys know better???? Arvindswamy along with his LEO Ad are from the bygone years and avandha thenja plaate eh potu therikarangana...Cha namba ooru manushanga irukangale... :D

After ranting all this out... I have to confess hat my mom's is infact on a look out for Aravind Swamy kinds as well! :-s Except that it's more her fixation than mine! I'd actually prefer someone like Vinay! :P

@ G3: I agree with ur last point! :D

Nautankey said...

gayathri,
LOL abt the dowry thingy...its very true..had a cousin of mine who used to get such comments..but now she is a doc and the groom was ready to pay :).

Haan if you are not bothered about what the world thinks about the pimple,acme on your face and lose sleep over that...thats the best sign of being confident over how you look...But that seldom happens especially till ur in early twenties

Nautankey said...

Curious,
The thing about parents searching bride/groom from their liking is spot on.I did have some saroja devi look alikes in my prospective bride list :P

Enan panradhu after arvindswamy not too many role models..maddy is there, but he lacks the posh executive look.

Kanupriya said...

Hey I checked that link, its cool!!! Really glad to know abt u...:-)

Nautankey said...

Hey thanks a lot kanupriya :)

Unknown said...

Nauts it still dosen't seem enough a reason for ur fairness quest! :D :D Unless u look like africa korangu manidhan anything sells! :D :D

Btw..i thought That sivaji joke is on the tips of everyones toungue these days? :D :D

Nautankey said...

Africa kurangu manidhan can also sell something but not me so MJ range-la edhavadhu[meant the plastic surgery part only] seyyanum :)..and sivaji comedy u mean the vivek quips about the uniqueness of black color? ..adhellam superstar-ku othu varum :)

S.. Diva said...

if you reached the marriageable age, then you shold be looking fo fair, slim, tall, from a good family/ good cultured, homely, convent educated, talented, sweet adjusting girl

Nautankey said...

sneha,
Aah even i went thru the classifieds last weekend :). And marriageable age tho I have reached 5years back as per my mom :)

sansmerci said...

hey u gota nice blog here m blogrollin u at sansmerci.in :)

Nautankey said...

Swarna,
A BIG Thanks from a fellow velacherian :)

Aarti said...

whoa!!! this is interesting.. thnk its the 1st time am reading the guy's side of the story... nice!!!

skin lightening? really?? woww!!! na, all those is just for ppl who are shallow n go by looks/skin color.. :)

chillax.. am sure like us all, u'll reach the point where u'll just say Buzz off to all those who push u towaads marriage or find someone u love!!! :D

till then, lets bowl, meet, cofffee, cook and wat not :d

Nautankey said...

aarti,
Godo thing you did not read it bfore..else would have tried to observe if the skin lightening treatment has done anything for me :P.And sadly the world has too many shallow people..not that we need to change for their sake but at times its fun to play with them :)

Oh yeaaaahhhh..lets do that what not part for once :))

praddy said...

new post pls :D

Meher :) said...

54 comments is enough na?

Start a new post now!

Nautankey said...

Praddy,
naansense..u have posted about any prospective subject which I can write about...resort weekend,bowling alley et al.. appuram enna new post pls.. grrrr

Nautankey said...

Meher,
Well its writer's block you see..not that i am hungry for comments..anyway thanks for helping to add more :)