Ram Sena here I come....

Long hours in office and even worse, working on weekends have made sure that I don't blog often, much to the happiness of many souls who got weeded out with my last post. But then I am back..argh I sound like some wannabe tamil super star who turns around stylishly and tells "I am back" though in reality none missed me :-).

Coming back to the topic (I am resolved this time around), the disgusting act @ mangalore pub stood as a testimony for the lack of historical/cultural value of the goondas involved. What’s all the fuss about? For thousands of years alcohol has been a part of indian culture and add to it ramayan, mahabharat speak about separate shalas for drinking..now aren't they kind of pubs. So buggers better don't stop me from following my ancient traditions. Jai Shri ram ki...three cheers..hic!!

And now coming to my other grouse..the 2d Saturday of this month, the day I dread the most and my annual brush with it. Every year when the calendar in my house screams Feb.14th I feel so frustrated and hope tragedies like a nuclear war, a meteor strike or a new SRK release takes place.

Should be a case of sour grapes, I am no 'pyar ki dushman' like the hindi movie heroinee's dad. When I hear questions like 'so what you do on feb14th' or a weird stare as if I am an alien when I say 'I don't have a girlfriend', seriously feel the idea of some huge scale tragedy is better.If I sound like a despo well fine I guess I am one.. Especially a cyber despo who hunts for victims on the net so if you know me personally count your days.

This may be because I am still waiting to get my kind of girl.. I know, I know such a weird imagination, and finding that kind of girl would be as be as tough as making me wear Kareena's jeans.

My first experience of VD(valentines day..if u remember a disease with the same short form I can't help it) was during my first year of college. I was in Loyola, an all guy’s college and my gang of friends bought around 10 tickets for a movie on feb14th.It fell on the first Friday, a day where we can go an hour late to college, thanks to the holy mass. We did not have an inkling of the holy and special importance of Feb 14th. On that specific day only 4 of us cud make to the film hall and Lo!! There was a sea of humanity. Guys of different shapes, sizes and colors with girls of the same specifications had crowded there, the guys holding their partner's hands so tightly as though she is gonna run away with a better looking one and the girls giggling for sweet nothings. Maaan we really felt left out and wanted to scream our hearts, lungs, kidneys out "I too want a girl!!!” but finally my brain(sometimes it works too) thought of an idea. We decided to sell all the 10 tickets we had, what with some of the crazy morons ready to shell out a bomb for it. After bumper sales with 300% profit we had a blast of a time in our own way. So VD had created some young entrepreneurs. Hail VD and down with those who are against it.

But soon after that year the reality of VD stuck me and most of my pals did settle with one or the other (meant the girl or her close pal who was messenger of love) for a VD date. And I take utmost care as to what to do on VD, this is applicable to all singles who are reading this a) Listen to music that is the utterly unromantic probably hearing Annu mallik/Reshammiya sing a duet will give some reasons to live thru the dreaded day b) Read about love stories which have failed or of stories about a college in Chennai which suspends guys or gals if they speak with each other.

Next is selecting the right TV channel preferably sports or cartoon, if at all you enter into the music channels, sorry I can assure you that you will end up drinking rat poison or aerated drink outta depression.They normally show the love affair of the newspaper boy, dhoodhwalla, dabbawalla and who not? and this is what seriously makes me to join the Ram sena.

If you take all the above mentioned precautions, hopefully you will carry on like me with the desperate single guy (DSG..wow sounds like DGP)tag without ending up as a violent fanatic thrashing girls at pubs. Though my DSG tag is fastly moving towards the danger of being taken off,I expect it to hang in her for few more months. So guys your pretty lady colleagues, neighbour's daughter, uncle's brother-in-law's niece and every other lady whom you have a crush on are still not safe...Beware!!